🔵 By Lorenzo Hutson. Photo by lauragrafie.
Throughout the legal proceedings of the process of my being held accountable for my unlawful actions, while the headliner was a victim of homicide, there remained a person who was lost in the process. Leothurs Futch, who at the time was 30-years old, was actively on parole, who had strong gang ties to a prison faction. This should not remain the legacy of a man due to his past. Futch is a son, a brother, uncle, as well as a husband, father (grandfather by now) and a friend to those who knew him personally. Futch had every right to be free from harm or injury just as much as anyone else.
On April 1, 2009 when I Lorenzo Hutson, fired shots in his direction, while he stood in front of his grandfather’s home, in Sao Pablo, California, there were ripple-effects of victimization unknown to me. Not only was Futch’s parole violated for missing his monthly appointment due to the police interviewing process, I additionally robbed Futch and his family of their safety. There were repairs needed for their home, and the neighbors felt unsafe, out of fear of future victimization, there is a barrage of collateral damage, which comes with attempted murder.
While I cannot speak directly for Futch, one could only envision that forgiveness is a long road, so I have taken steps to gain insight into understanding which type of amends would be appropriate. A “living amends” entails living by example in every rehabilitative endeavor to honor those whom I have harmed who are either deceased, or who may not be ready to exhibit forgiveness, which he has every right to feel. In March 2018, while on Facility-B I participated in VAOP (Victims Awareness Offender Program) Victim Impact to understand the harms I have caused that I was acutely blind to.
That my actions not only affected Futch, “primary effects” include his wife and five children and the rest of his family who visits the patriarch’s residence. “Secondary effects” includes investigators, first responders, neighbors, and the community as a whole. “Tertiary effects” involve having to relive the emotional impact in front of a courtroom, my decisions are wasting taxpayer’s dollars and law enforcement’s resources. In January 2019, I participated in VAOP-II, Restorative Justice, facilitated the same groups in 2022 to encourage the prevention of another person or property from victimization. I believe it is imperative to demonstrate how one person’s actions towards another does not stop there, those actions will affect people who we have never met or knew existed. By facilitating groups such as criminals and gang members anonymous to address how criminality origins from and we can challenge engagement of academic studies to prevent myself from placing myself in a position of hurting another person. I have earned my GED in 2014, my associate’s degree in 2022. there will never be any amount of apologies that I could ever express that will ever be enough to compensate for my misdeeds.
Even more so because I have been in Futch’s position of being a survivor of a shooting when I was 17-years old on April 22, 2000 in Richmond, California, so I am aware of the emotions of “loss of personal power” and “past traumatic stress disorder” associated with such an experience. I may never earn the privilege to express my shame and guilt, however, how I intend to honor the unsung survivor is to continue to live by spiritual principles, so that the unsung survivor no longer remains unheard of.